Dougie Poynter's Man Journal
by joongie
Summary: The boys have decided to keep journals, this is Dougie's story... SLASHH! COMPLETE PoynterJudd FletcherJones
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own McFly or Dougie Poynter. IF YOU DO NOT LIKE SLASH OR MENTIONS OF SLASH DO NOT READ! I repeat, THIS IS SLASH!**

**A/N: Yay for Flones and Pudd!! McFly Slashone of the best kinds of slash LOL x **

Dougie Poynter's Man Journal

Day Uno

I've decided to keep a journal, a MAN journal because that just sounds better than diary right? So anyway today I got up and headed downstairs for my usual morning toast and coffee and when I arrived in the kitchen I saw the oddest thing. Tom…naked….in only an I promptly took a piece of bread off the table and slowly headed back towards my room before collapsing on the bed and letting out a moan. Was no one sane in this house anymore? A knock came from my door which I sadly had to get up and get.

"Hello Douglas!" Danny said with his big grin. He was naked too. I promptly shut the door in his face and ran into my bathroom with this journal. I think Danny thinks I'm a depressed emo freak who needs love and attention. Can anything get worse than this? Harry and I might be the only sane ones left in this house!

Day Dos

Seriously, stairs are not God's gift to man. So this evening I was coming up from eating some dinner and Harry just seems to pop out of nowhere.

"Dougie, do you think Tom's gay?" He asked me seriously at the top of the stairs. I started laughing until I realized it was an actual question.

"Well I've never actually thought about it really, why you ask?"

"Because he just ran past my room saying something about shagging with Danny?" Harry said cringing.

"He was probably just kidding, get your mind out of the gutter wanker!" I pushed him in the arm and somehow ended up falling backwards down the stairs. Harry, of course being the gentleman that he is, helped me up and kissed my forehead. KISSED MY FOREHEAD? Hold on bathroom time.

_Well I didn't mean the kissing forehead part, I thought it would seem comforting? And you have no right to call me a wanker!!- Harry_

I only went to the bathroom, which gave Harry no right to write in MY man journal. He will be severely punished the next time I see him…maybe with chains and- DOUGIE YOU ARE STRAIGHT. STRAIGHT DAMMIT!

Day Tres

I've decided to title all my entries with Spanish numbers because it just seems manlier and this is my man journal right? Ha. So today we had to do this show on GMTV and we we're going to play All About You of course as everyone loves it so much. I got confused and got lost backstage and tried to find the guys….and you know what I found instead? Three guesses and the first two don't count.

"Guys?" I said leaning around the side of the empty stage, our show not starting for another hour or so, "I got lost and I'm not sure where to go!" I heard noises coming from Harry's drum kit and assumed someone was going to play a trick on me and walked over towards it. "Not funny guys, you know I don't like dark lonely spaces." That was when I saw it, Tom and Danny….having sex.

"AHHHHHHHHHH! HARRRRYYYY!" I screamed running down the dark hallway until I found a dressing room where my band mate was drinking a beer and beating his drumsticks on a table. I ran towards the curious man and hid behind his chair.

"Doug, why are bloody screaming and why are you hiding behind my chair?" Harry asked with that pursed lips look he gets when he's not happy. He got up and got his nice jeans and took off his other pants. I looked away and blushed, wait…I'm blushing over HARRY with NO pants?

"Because…I saw…"  
"You saw…?"

"I-I-I saw DAN AND TOM HAVING SEX!" I screamed and covered my eyes.

"Oh, you've had something to drink haven't you…we're they really?" Harry asked curious as he went towards and leaned out the door.

"BEHIND YOUR DRUM KIT!" I blurted out.

"NO FUCKING WAY, NOT NEAR MY DRUM KIT!" Harry shouted as he raced out the door and down the hallway.

"Haz…your pants…" I said holding up the pair of jeans he had been changing into and just let my voice die until I heard a scream. So I ran down the hall, Harry's pants in hand, and found the taller boy hiding behind a cymbal.

"Harry, what are you screaming about?" Tom asked, standing there fully dressed but with an 'I've-just-had-amazing-sex' look. Danny looked curious as he buttoned up the rest of his shirt and put his sweater on.

"Mate, are you not wearing any trousers?" Danny asked in his strong Bolton accent. Harry gave a squeak as I put a hand on my head and handed him his pants.

"Wait, Doug is holding your trousers…your missing them…YOU TWO WERE ABOUT TO HAVE SEX?!" Danny decided as he looked back and forth between me and Harry.

"WHAT!? NO!" I said in shock, "NO! NO! NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER!!"

"Woah, cool down mate, I was just joking." Danny said laughing, "Unless you really were about to have sex…"  
"Dan, shut up." Harry said as he finished putting on his belt buckle.

"Aw, don't yell at Danny like that!" Tom said as he hugged the younger guitarist next to him.

"YOU TWO WERE…FORNICATING….BEHIND HIS DRUM KIT!" I declared pointing from them to the floor.

"And?"

"Oh so you two really are together?" Harry said simply as if Tom had just clearified that he was going out to get lunch instead of clarifying he and our other best friend we're gay together.

"Yes, haven't you noticed? We told you all week…" Tom said as he held onto his lover.

"We thought you we're joking," I commented. Soon the studio people started filtering in and the boys broke apart so no one would notice, even though I can't see how you wouldn't from all their touching and undressing each other with their eyes and stuff, but all the same still. We soon finished and I couldn't help thinking how great Harry looked today, how his blue eyes sparkled, how his arse looked so wonderful in those pants, how I could just kiss him right there…WHAT? WAIT. SCRATCH THAT. I NEVER WROTE THAT, THIS IS A MAN JOURNAL. I LIKE WOMEN! YAY FOR BOOBS!

Day Cuatro

Luckily I hide this journal every night or otherwise Harry might know what I mistakenly said and never meant. Never. Nada. Zero. Zilch. Hold on, I need to find my bass since we're going to see some kids today or something for a contest…I forget where I placed it after last night...

_OH HOHO! I think our little Douglas has himself a crush on Harry… -Danny_

_DAN! STOP WRITING IN DOUGIE'S DIARY!! It's his own private book and currently you are turning me on with no shirt, come on…let's go to the bathroom together…- Tom_

I leave for about five minutes and came back to find this, what the heck. Why do they tell me things that I do not want to know? Even though I wouldn't mind going to the bathroom with Harry….STOP DOUG STOP, YOU LIKE WOMEN WITH BREASTS AND LEGS AND MULLETS…oh crap sticks…I'm going insane…women with mullets?! I've decided to take this journal with me as I head downstairs, so hold on a moment. Okay I'm now downstairs, just so you know, and have found James Bourne in our downstairs closet.

"Hi James." I said as I pulled out my hat and closed the closet door. I stopped and looked around for a second before pulling the door open. "What are you doing in our closet?"

"Uh…this isn't the cinema!? I NEED MY MONEY BACK!" James declared as he walked out of the closet and out our front door into the morning sun. I shook my head and headed over to get something to eat in the kitchen which is where I'm writing from now. Harry just asked if that was James Bourne going out our front door and I told him that he had been in our closet looking for the cinema. Danny, who had been sitting at the table eating a sandwich, gave his confused look and almost choked on his sandwich since he stopped thinking about chewing…we have problems with that all the time…Harry started beating on Danny's back and I am laughing from my position on the counter writing as he had turned a bit blue a second ago. Tom's come downstairs singing a song about being gay or something, says it's from West Side Story…why is no one normal in this house?! I don't think I'm even normal with my gay urges, the non-existent gay urges thank you very much.


	2. Chapter 2

Day Cinco

Currently I wasn't sure what to think in this world as we sat in the kitchen eating lunch that Harry and Tom had somehow made. Now I know Tom is suppose to be the cook but when he thinks about Danny or something he freaks out and burns everything and I mean EVERYTHING. Harry was going on about a new drum kit he wanted and Tom was playing footsie under the table with Danny and kept getting my foot confused with his…the horror…Tom was telling us all about how he secretly writes slash stories based off his and Danny's adventures and Harry was giving me the oddest look through the whole conversation. Finally Danny asked me to run and get some things from the pantry and I ran over into the dark enclosed area as soon as I could, knowing that Harry's eyes were watching me.

"Hi James." I said as I grabbed the beer and turned the light on.

"Hi Doug." James responded as he turned the light back off when I left. I sat back down at the table and realized something.

"James Bourne's in our pantry!" I squealed as everyone stopped what they were doing and rushed to it to find James standing there with a bag.

"James, what are you doing in our bloody pantry?!" Tom asked confused.

"THIS ISN'T THE MALL?" James shouted and we watched him run out the door.

"Did he have a bag?"

"I suspect so, wonder what's in it…" Danny replied with a shrug. I finished lunch and ran upstairs to my room and got on the computer while Tom did the dishes. The one thing is no one knew that I went online a lot and posed as a guy named Peter that liked McFly on things like the McFly boards and on MSN. I signed on and closed my door so no one knew of my doings and saw that this girl I had made friends with was on.

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!11:_

HIYA PETE PMSL LOLOLOLL!!!!1111

_PeteMaster:_

Uh hi there Helen

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!1:_

DID U C THE NEW INTERVIEW MCFLY DID? TOM N DAN R OBVSLY GAY TGTHR

_PeteMaster:_

Can't say I did, and what make you think that?

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!1:_

WELL TOM WAS LIKE ALL LOOKIN IN DAN'S PANTS AREA OMGGG THT WULD BE SO HOT RITE:OOO HOPFULY DOUG ISN'T TAKN I WUB HIIIM!!!11

_PeteMaster:_

As far as I know he's single….but you never know

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!1_:

OMMGG R U GOING TO THE GIG TM WE CULD MT UP?

_PeteMaster:_

Er…I'm not sure if I'm going yet…

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!:_

O WELL THTS NOT PROPER, C U HAF TO GO PEETTTEEEER LOLOLOL

_PeteMaster:_

I just have…things…to do that take time

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!1:_

HLD ON K?

I sat there and looked around and soon there was a knock on my door and I quickly hid all my sites and stuff with my itunes and went to get my bedroom door.

"Brought you some cake that we got!" Harry said smiling as he handed me the cake. I smiled and took it and waved as he headed back down the hall.

_PeteMaster:_

You there?

_HELENTENNIEONG!!1:_

SOZ HAD TO GIVE SOMEFIN TO MI BRO, I SPIT IN IT THOUGH LOLOL

_PeteMaster:_

That's not nice…

_HELENTENNIEONG!!!1:_

WELL HE DSRVES IT K? I WUB DOUGIE DON'T U?

_PeteMaster:_  
You know I like Harry the most

I kept talking to the teenie, who actually was a bit creepy at times, and kept on eating the cake Harry brought me. Who ever made it was a really good cook…maybe I should go find some more…hopefully James won't be there.

Day Seis

This morning I heard noises coming from Harry's room and I wandered down there after taking a shower and getting changed. Somehow he had gotten himself stuck in his own closet with his shirt over his head so I had to pull him out…let's just say that didn't go right. He ended up laying on top of me, his shirt on his arms above his head and his pants falling down and guess who happened to walk in? Tom. He started freaking out and saying things like SORRY SORRY DIDN'T MEAN TO INTERUPPT! I got out of their as quick as I could and ran down the stairs after him.

"Tom, it wasn't…it wasn't what it looked like!" I sputtered out.

"What do you mean; it looked a lot like you were taking off Harry's clothes!" Tom said with a bright red face. And then, in the middle of our discussion, Danny came through the kitchen in nothing but a leotard and one of those tutu things.

"Ello mates!" Danny said as he got a beer from the fridge and went up the stairs.

"Was that…"  
"I think so.."  
"In a tutu?"  
"Yep."

"Go ahead." I said with a sigh and sat on the counter as Tom ran after his lover. Harry wandered down the stairs wearing a sweater with a bright red flush over his face.

"Sorry bout that, did you tell Tom?"  
"Yeah, no biggie." I replied smiling, I couldn't resist saying something bad to those crystal blue eyes.

"Good…" Harry said and the conversation became silent as we just stood there in the kitchen, "Was that Danny in a tutu?"  
"Yes, don't know where he got it though,"

"Vicky maybe?"  
"Do you really see her having a tutu?" I replied with a pointed glance. We spent the rest of the day working on random songs for the next album and on dying Tom's hair brown which actually looked really fit, but who was I to say that out loud? I played with my lizards, NO NOT LIKE THAT YOU WEIRDO PERVS READING THIS, and watched some telly before dinner and then headed up to my room. Harry wandered in at about ten and we watched Not Another Teen Movie in my room and heard all these noises coming from Tom's room upstairs…which didn't have a door. Harry and I looked at each other and then army crawled to Tom's stairs and up the stairs until we got to the top parts.

"Danny, watch it!" Tom shouted and Harry leaned on top of me and made the shush sign as we both peered around to find Tom and Danny sitting there…playing with dolls…

"Are they playing with DOLLS?" I whispered to Harry. Harry tried not to giggle and hurried silently to get the video camera. Soon he came back and started recording it all.

"This is so going online," Harry commented with a smirk. I laughed and tried to keep down my giggle fit. Soon Danny looked over.

"Wait, what are you doing with that camera?" Danny said in shock.

"GET THEM!" Tom screamed as me and Harry rushed down the stairs. Harry put the video dvd in his pants and rushed after me as we sprinted to the first floor.

"GIVE ME THAT CAMERA!" Danny said as he tripped over the couch and completely fell on the floor.

"NEVER!" I screamed as I took Harry's hand and we ran outside laughing. Soon we collapsed in the grass and Tom found the video camera.

"HA!"

"YOU DIDN'T WIN FLETCHER!" Harry said as he took the mini dvd out of his pants and waved it. It was just another night at the McFly house, nothing was ever normal.

Day Siete

After last nights adventures something had started changing, maybe it was the way I looked at Harry or maybe it was the fact that he ended up sleeping in my bed last night. I woke up this morning with his arms AROUND MY WAIST and holding me.

"Good morning sweetheart…" Harry mumbled as he nuzzled against me.

"Good morning Harry…WAIT HARRY?" I screamed and stumbled out of the bed, "WHAT THE BLOODY FUCKING HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY BLOODY FUCKING BED?"

"Did you just say bloody fucking? DEAR LORD DOUGIE CONTROL THAT MOUTH OF YOURS!" Harry said as he rubbed his eyes.

"Why are you all ruddy screaming?" Tom asked as he walked into the doorway, "Is Harry in your bed/?"

"YES! I want to know why!!" I protested as I scrunched against the wall feeling vulnerable.

"Must have been after we taped Tom and Danny with the dolls…remember we had those beers? I must of just stayed here instead of going back to my room." Harry said scratching his head, "You worry too much Doug."  
"Well most people do when they wake up in their bed with their best friend holding them!!" I pointed out and rolled my eyes. The rest of the morning went fine and we decided to go out to lunch before going to do this surprise for these kids who raised money for Red Nose Day. Sometime during our lunch Danny decided to tell us all that he was extreamly sore…down there…and wouldn't be able to come with us to our surprise performance. We figured we couldn't tell Fletch that Danny couldn't come because he had been having too much wild sex with Tom so we sent Danny back in a cab and decided to say he got majorly sick out of no where…it was better than the sex reason. The surprise went really well even though I had to sing Danny's part. At the end after we said goodbye to the children Harry put one of those Red Nose Day headbands on and told me that I did really well…and then proceeded to squeeze my arse…YES MY ARSE. And even though I felt a little odd, it was well enjoyable…wait Dougie stop this! STOP THIS NOW!! YOU LIKE THE WOMAN, THE PARTYING, THE SEX WITH HARRY…NOT WITH HARRY, WITH WOMEN! I'm going to go before I write anything else that could get out.

_Seems to me that our little Dougie has himself a new love –Tom_

I SAW YOU WRITE THIS!!! I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY FROM THE MAN JOURNAL!

_You mean diary right? – Tom_

I do not keep a diary I keep a MAN JOURNAL because I am MANLY with my MANLY clothes and MANLY MANLINESS.

_Doug, when you sing you sound like a girl, your body is a thin as a girls, and your eyes are as pretty as a girls…your basically a girl in disguise love. –Tom_

LIES! LIES, LIES, LIES, LIES! I'm going and TAKING THIS JOURNAL WITH ME THIS TIME!

_All of us are keeping journals Dougie; we just don't call them MAN JOURNALS silly! –Tom_

You are? WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME THIS? I THOUGHT I WAS AN INDIVIDUAL! CRAP STICKS, I'M GOING TO MY ROOM WITH MY LIZARDS!

_And porno… -Tom_

STOP THAT!


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Blah blah blah do not own McFly**

**A/N: K I'm alive, was gone for most of the weekend! I love this show from Japan called Hana Yori Dango and wow I'm in love with Hanazawa Rui!! EEEP! Oh, hope you enjoy this :**

Day Siete

I have permanently banned Tom Fletcher from being anywhere near this man journal because of his antics on the last entry. BANNED FOR EVER! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Kay, sorry, had an evil moment there. So this morning after I woke up, set Mr. Snuggles in his little sitting place by my pillow, and brushed my teeth, I headed to Harry's room and heard Britney Spears music. Slowly I tiptoed in and leaned into Harry's bathroom to see him standing in front of the mirror, in only his boxers, singing into a hairbrush. Now the being in his boxers thing was a bit uh scandalous and made my mouth water, I MEAN IT MADE ME WANT TO TURN AROUND AND RUN AWAY, but I couldn't help it when I figured out what he was singing.

"I'M NOT A GIRL, NOT YET A WOMANNNN!!" Harry sang badly, not caring who heard him as he posed and moved his hands around.

"OH you want me to make you a woman?" I asked as I slithered up behind him and enjoyed the feeling of his skin on mine, "Aw is little Hazza blushing?"

"What?! No!" Harry said as he pushed me away, "What do you think you're doing?!"

"That hurt's Harry," I said motioning to my heart, "Right here!"

"OUT OF MY BATHROOM! OUT, OUT, OUT!" Harry said grabbing me and pushing me out the door, "I need to take a shower.

"Are you sure I can't come with you?" I replied. YES I CAN'T BELIEVE MYSELF EITHER, THAT WAS SO NOT MANLY!

"WHAT?" Harry said and slammed the door. I shook my head and headed back to my room to find James Bourne outside the window.

"Er James, what are you doing outside my window on this morning in a tree?" I asked opening the window.

"JAMES? WHAT JAMES? No one here but us squirrels!" James declared and pretended to be a squirrel. It was like a bad cartoon if you ask me. I shut the window and then the curtains and shook my head before putting some clothes on before going downstairs.

"Entering the kitchen, better not run into some funny business!" I said as I got to the bottom of the stairs and walked into the kitchen to find Tom's shirt messed up and Danny's hair all shaggy.

"Ah so there was funny business!"

"Uh no way," Danny said with that shifty eyed look he gets when he's lying.

"Harry was singing I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman in his bathroom this morning." I told the two boys as I got a glass of orange juice and sat down.

"Really? Does that mean he's finally coming out of the closet?" Tom inquired as he cooked some eggs.

"You think Harry's GAY?" I said, "G-A-Y, GAY?"

"Yes G-A-Y gay, not happy gay obviously." Tom said rolling his eyes.

"James Bourne was also outside my window impersonating a squirrel."

"We really need to get a restraining order on him." Danny decided.

"But he's one of my best friends!" Tom declared as he waved the spatula he was using around.

"PUT THE SPATULA DOWN AND NO ONE WILL GET HURT!!" I stated and started laughing.

"Well course he's one of your best mates, but he really shouldn't show up at our house in all these weird places all the time!" Danny said as he got up and opened the curtain in the kitchen to show James hanging off the roof waving at them and then closed them again. I shook my head and went back upstairs, not much else happened that day except for a meeting with Fletch about more shows and stuff to premote the new song. Oh well I guess Harry hit on me more than usual today, like more than the joking way. STOP DOUGIE STOP, YOU ARE STRAIGHT, YOU ARE STRAIGHT! YOU LIKE GIRLS! YOU LIKE GIRLS NAMED HARRY…WHAT?! NO GIRLS JUST GIRLS, NOT GIRLS NAMED HARRY WHO HAVE SEXY BUMS AND CRYSTAL BLUE EYES. Excuse me while I got try to jump off the roof.

Tom stopped me from jumping off the roof; he was up there trying to get James off apparently before Danny killed him. He wanted to know why I was on the roof, I told him it was because I was going insane. Ha take that Fletcher.

Day Ocho

Danny and Harry both now think that I need to go to the loony bin according to what Tom has told them. Danny's handing me depression medication and they all think I'm like an emo or something. ME, DOUGIE POYNTER, AN EMO? HA! HOW FUNNY IS THAT? I got online today for once and talked to Helen who was going on about how sexy I am and how she thinks that Harry and Dougie should hook up and make babies or something…I told her that she was crazy because the male anatomy does not allow us to have babies. Wait, what? DID I JUST NOT DENY THE IDEA OF ME AND HARRY GOING AT IT LIKE RABBITS??! You never saw that, you never saw anything. Today I decided to also shave my pubes again even though everytime I got to the bathroom I freak out and run screaming to one of the guys that someone stole my man hair. Harry's mad because I nicked his razor again! Well that shows him for trying to force me to read books about anti-depression and making me think that I'm in love with him. WHICH I'M NOT OBVIOUSLY, I mean it is obvious right? So I think about him like everyday and I wish I could sleep with him- NO, NO I DON'T. I WISH THAT I COULD BE SLEEPING WITH UH CHRISTINA AGULERIA…YEAH SHE'S A HOTTIE MC HOT HOT RIGHT? YEAH THAT.

Sorry I just spent the last twenty minutes talking to myself about how Christina Aguleria is so fit and Harry isn't just to prove my point. I think Tom heard me because when he came in to get his shirt that I had barrowed he was looking at me odd…or he was looking at me odd because of the fact that I was missing most of my clothes. Either way he looked at me odd didn't he? Do you know how hard it is to sleep with him and Danny going at it all the time at night? IT'S LIKE NEITHER OF THEM GET TIRED! They are just energizer bunnies that just keep going and going and going and going…

"Dougie, what do you write about in your diary?" Harry asks me as I write this in the family room.

"Things that happen, stuff, you know the usual."

'The usual?" Harry inquired, "Are you depressed for real Dougie?"

"Er no, why would you think that?"

"Tom said you we're going to kill yourself by jumping off the roof so that's a giveaway but I mean you seem a little sadder maybe?"

"I WAS NOT GOING TO KILL MYSELF!! I was going simply up there to see the sky!"

"It was cloudy."

"SO? MAYBE I DIDN'T KNOW THAT!" And that's when I left and locked myself in my room. Sometimes that Harry Judd can just get the biggest rise out of me! Maybe it's because I'm in love with him.

….

What did I just say?

Day Nueva

I've decided that yesterday's final note in the entry was just the pills Danny forced me to take talking, I do not love Harry Judd in any kind of way but a brotherly one obviously. Today I tried to completely avoid him for the pure fact that I was worried I would blurt out something strange so I sat myself in front of the TV and played the new racing game Tom had gotten as a gift.

"Mind if I play with you?" Tom said walking in, "Danny and Harry are over at the studio taking care of some things."

"Sure dude, take a seat." I said patting beside me and the dark brown haired boy sat down and took the other controller.

"Dougie I have a bet. If I win, you tell me the truth." Tom said as we picked cars.

"The truth about what?"

"Harry." I gulped and looked at him with wide eyes, how could he do this to me?

"And if I win?"

"Then I will never bother you about it again, even in your diary I won't."

"HAVE YOU BEEN READING IT!?" I screamed in angst.

"No Doug, not since that one time." Tom said rolling his eyes as the game started. For most of the game I was beating Tom but at the last second he somehow pulled ahead of me and won.

"Never face the guy who owns the game. Now spill!" Tom said turning to me.

"Well uh I don't know, it's just I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM TOM!" I declared finally and put my head in my hands, "I'm not supposed to be like this, you're the gay one!"

"HEY! That's offensive you know!" Tom said laughing, "And maybe you like him Doug, did you think of that?"

"Yeah but I yell at myself everytime I think it and that's why I was going to jump off the roof."

"So you we're going to kill yourself because you thought you were falling in love with Hazza?"

"That's one way to put it, or slightly damage myself as I like to say."

"Silly, silly Doug!" Tom said shaking his head, "Did you ever think that Harry might like you too?" And that's when I got up and went to my room to write in this journal. Even if I did like Harry he wouldn't like me back because he's obviously straight right? I mean all those hugs and stuff we're just for jokes…right? SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME I'M RIGHT!!!!

I think I'm going to go into my bathroom and just sit in the empty tub with this book and my mp3 player so no one can get to me, maybe then I'll figure it out.

It's been a couple hours since I locked myself in the bathroom now, Harry and Danny got home a little while ago. No one has noticed yet that I'm missing and I wish Harry was in this tub with me possibly… for once I'm not going to deny what I just said. YES WORLD IT'S TRUE, DOUGIE LEE POYNTER LIKES HIS BEST FRIEND HARRY MARK CHRISTOPHER JUDD. It feels so good to get that off my chest. Oh there's a knock at the door, I'll write about it later kay? It's probably Tom telling me dinner's done or whatever.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Do not own the sex pots that are McFly, did you see those pictures in Barbados? HOT TAMELES! **

**A/N: I am a dork, yes I know this. By the way I have named the other three stories that will come after this one, all four end at 20 days because of a reason to be named later. Who should I do next? Harry, Tom, or Danny? TELL ME IN A REVIEW PLEASE!**

Day Diez

Actually it's still kind of Day Nueve because the morning of the next day, but I thought it would be weird to write another Day Nueve don't you think? Currently I am writing by flashlight, WHY IS THAT I HEAR YOU CRY? Ha, I just used one of our own lines against you. CRY NOW CRY DAMMIT.

Okay I'm better now, sorry. See when I opened the door I found it to be James actually who had slipped in the ventilation system somehow (Tom's ordered for those to be fixed so nothing can get in now) and he had a toaster with him for some reason. Suddenly there was a thunderstorm outside, WHEN IT HAD JUST BEEN SUNNY AND BLUE SKIES, and James turned on the water in the bathtub and stuck the toaster in….He forgot to plug it in needless to say so he took the toaster out and then plugged it back in while holding it causing his body to light up like a light bulb and fry our lights for the night. SERVES HIM RIGHT FOR SNEAKING UP ON ME WHILE I WAS HAVING A HEART TO HEART MOMENT! We had to call the cops and they transported James out who was looking a bit burnt and was still holding the toaster. Currently it is almost silent in the McFly household except for this squeaking noise that I just can't figure out where it's coming from…. I've decided to head down the hall and bring you with me journal so we can investigate this together.

"ER, someone there?" I asked looking around. I shuffled down to Harry's room to find his door locked and shrugged before heading down another door to Danny's room.

"Danny?" I asked frightened, there must be a reason for this uncanny silence. No one was in his room and no one was in Tom's upstairs. I have now grabbed Mr. Snuggles and proceeded to run downstairs in complete fright and terror that I could almost be shitting my pants currently. Soon I heard some kind of noises and headed towards our kitchen where they seemed to be coming from.

…

Oh shitocky mushrooms with cheese on top.

Day Once

I'm back and yes I realized journal that I left you on the counter yesterday when I ran screaming out the backdoor and into the woods. But there was a reason for the screaming and the panicking! When I got to the kitchen I found Harry, Tom, and Danny all in girls clothes…DANCING! Now I know I said that I was now gay or whatever and that I was in love with Harry but seriously, CROSS DRESSING IS TAKING IT TOO FAR. I huddled up in the woods beside a tree and like an hour later a normal dressed Harry found me hiding beside the tree.

"Dougie what the bloody hell are you doing?" Harry asked adjusting his sweater.

"HIDING FROM YOU BLOODY LUNATICS!" I screamed and snuggled my bear, "Mr. Snuggles is the only one that understands me!"

"And you call us lunatics?" Harry said laughing as he sat beside me, "Seriously, what's wrong?"

"YOU WERE ALL DRESSED AS GIRLS HARRY! GIRLS!!!"

"And you don't want to know the reason?" Harry asked looking right at me and making my heart flutter.

"Uh reason? Wasn't it because you have all become cross dressers and joined a burlesque club?"

"No Doug, it's because Danny and Tom are going to this costume part with Matt Willis and they all decided to dress up as three Victorian ladies for some reason…really odd if you ask me…and Tom wanted me to put on the outfit since you weren't around to help." Harry explained.

"That is the weirdest thing I have ever heard. Why don't they just go as ghosts or something?"

"Cause it's the middle of July…"

"Oh right, that would put a damper on things wouldn't it?" I replied smiling, "So you're not a cross dresser or a lunatic?"

"That would be James Bourne," Harry stated with a grin as he flipped his hat around. We sat there in the woods and talked for what seemed like ages before Tom called out saying there was dinner and then I fell asleep and woke up about five and here we are now in the car! See today we have to go to this children's show and do the usual answer questions, play stupid games thing. Harry and Danny decided to sing show tunes all the way there, SHOW TUNES IS NOT MANLY, and I almost killed Danny when he broke into a rendition of My Heart Will Go On from Titanic…I'd rather die by show tunes. Currently we're walking into this studio which is why my writings a little funky sorry. I wonder when we're done what we're going to do with these book things, I mean I've seen Harry write in one and Danny write in one which means Tom probably has one. Maybe we should frame you all and place you in a scrap book or something? That would be nice, even though I don't want people knowing my secrets like I shave my pubes or something. Harry was reading over my shoulder and told me that everyone already knows that because of Danny saying it in an interview. Excuse me while I beat Danny over the head with this book.

Back, sorry I was gone so long. See I had to put you away after beating Danny with you because we were about to go on this show and Dougie has made a boo boo. Well we were getting asked questions you know like what's our favorite color, do we have girlfriends, do we do normal things in our free time, the usual. Except this time a new question was asked.

"Do any of you keep secrets from the other guys?" a little girl who had to be about 12 asked looking at us.

"Oh that's a toughie because we are always in each others lives." Danny said thinking.

"We are always there around each other because you know we live together." Tom agreed nodding his head.

"How about you Dougie?" the host asked, which usually never happens because they all think I'm the quiet one and currently I had been deep in thought about covering Harry with chocolate.

"I'm in love with Harry." I said and the snapped up straight and Tom started laughing.

"And I'm in love with Danny! Doug's sucha kidder, no we really don't have secrets." Tom said smiling, nice save Fatty Fletcher. The show continued and no one seemed to notice that what I said HADN'T been a joke except for one certain person…crap sticks….

Day Dose

I've locked myself in my room with food and water and a phone and have decided to never come out. We got back from that interview right and Harry wanted to talk to me…so being the smart person that I was I grabbed tons of food and stuff and ran into my room and locked the door. Luckily I have a bathroom equipped or I'd be peeing out the window which probably isn't good for the flowers or our neighbors really. Currently I am sitting in the bathtub again and contemplating my life and how much I just screwed it up.

"STUPID DOUGIE!" I said whacking myself in the head repeatedly, "NEVER SAY YOU LOVE YOUR BEST FRIEND ON TELEVISION! NEVER!" Tom and Danny had been trying to get me to come out of my room and currently the three were at the studio planning on what to record or something for the B-Side of our next single and told Fletch that I had come down with a bad cold and couldn't be there. LOVE COLD IF YOU ASK ME, Harry could never be with this….I'm skinny, I'm a weirdo, I have no sex appeal, and I love lizards. Freak walking, just point a sign at my head that reads WEIRDO WHOS A QUEER..IDO. I have now decided to shave my legs because this hair is just out of control and will use Harry's razor that I nicked earlier this week to do it.

Alright so that took a really long time and when I finished the guys were back and are currently trying to coax me out of the room.

"DOUGIE REALLY, THIS IS JUST STUPID!" I can hear Tom shout.

"NO IT'S NOT!"

"AT LEAST TALK TO HARRY?"

"WHY WOULD HARRY WANT TO TALK TO A FREAK LIKE ME?!"

"Dougie, you're not a freak." Another voice added in that made my breath catch, "Now stop barcadding yourself in your room! You nicked my razor didn't you?"

"Oh sorry, you needed that?"

"I bet before we got here you were in the bathtub with your journal and you were talking to yourself." Harry replied with a giggle, "And I can always get another razor, but not another Dougie."

"Fine, I'll come out." I said as I got up and scurried to the door to unlock it to find the three boys waiting outside it with happy faces.

And that's when it happened (ha freaked you out with the big space didn't I? I think I'm very good at this suspense thing…that's why they call me Doug. Doug TRIPLE X.)


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not own ze band called McFly or James Bourne **

**A/N:** Speaking of James Bourne, he's dating a 16 year old and he's 26….right moving on. Second to last chapter people, can you feel the suspense?

Dougie: No, they can't because DOUG TRIPLE X ISN'T HERE

Me: You're standing right there, wait a second how'd you get out of the story?

Dougie: Plot holes duh, I'd like to thank all the reviewers for saying they love me! Blows kisses

Me: They obviously love the author and not the authoriee or whatever…

Dougie: THAT'S NOT EVEN A BLOODY F-

Me: DON'T YOU DARE USE THAT WORD.

Dougie: What, fungus?

Me: Blood fungus? shoves Dougie back in plot hole Later gators, enjoy while I take care of a nuisance named Dougie Lee Poynter.

Day Trese

Sorry I left it off like that, but there was this whole mess and we ended up having to come down to the police station for questioning…well ah…let me tell you what happened. So I opened the door right to find Harry staring right at me with Danny and Tom on either side of him and he was just about to say something when all of a sudden someone shows up….three guesses and the first two don't count. There was James Bourne, with an ax, screaming his love for me and running right at Harry. Luckily James has really bad hand eye coordination and completely missed me or Harry and kept running until he hit the end of the hallway and fell over. Danny immediately broke out crying and Tom had to hold him and sing to him since this had been one of his worst nightmares (James holding an ax as your worst nightmare, who would of thought!). Harry rushed to the phone in the hallway and called the police who had been out looking for him since he broke out of his restraint and grabbed this lumberjack's ax. The police finally came while James was unconscious and we all went down to the police station to testify that James freakin Bourne was, in fact, a tad bit insane. It didn't take long and Tom dragged us all home and I just fell over dead asleep until now when I decided to get my journal out. Hold on a second, I'm getting on my laptop at like 6 in the morning, I'll write down what happens with Helen if she's on. Something's a bit odd bout that one!

_Pete's Da Man:_

Hello Helen!

_HELENONGTEENIE!!!!11:_

OMG PETEERRR!!!!!111ELEVENTYONEONEONE

_Pete's Da Man:_

Yes , nice to see you too. Now I have a dilemma that you could help me with.

_HELENONGTEENIE!!!!11:_

WOT IZ IT?!?

_Pete's Da Man:_

I'm in love with my best friend and I don't know if he even cares about me that way!

_HELENONGTEENIE!!!11:_

I BET HE DOEZ PETE! PMSL

_Pete's Da Man_

Wait, how do you know it's a guy?

_HELENONGTEENIE!!!11:_

U SED U WUR GAY DIDN'T U?

_Pete's Da Man:_

Don't remember that, but alright. I'm going to go and see what time it is and what my friends are up too, thanks for your help Helen

_Pete's Da Man has signed off._ For some reason Helen seems oddly like someone I already know, just can't put my finger on it.

Apparently it's 10:00 AM already and no one's come to wake me up yet which is unusual in this house, especially with Harry around. I'm going to investigate, if I don't come back journal please take care of Zukie and my other lizards alright? Even though you have no hands…or a brain….whatever.

I took you with me anyway and now Harry is looking at me strange as I am scribbling furiously in you. See I tip toed out and looked into Danny's room to see him and Tom asleep in the bed looking like little angels. Harry came walking up and looked in with me and seemed to laugh about it.

_More like devils if you ask me- Harry_

Or devils as Harry puts it and then wandered over to Harry's er brightly decorated room.

_Oi what don't you like about my room?!- Harry_

You have a pig next to Britney Spears and I find both disgusting!

_You find Britney Spears disgusting? And the pig is cuddly! –Harry_

Right whatever, I've decided to go spend the rest of the day in my room being an emo with the toaster James killed.

_We have to go to a magazine interview at like three Doug –Harry_

FINE THEN HAZ! I'M GOING TO MY ROOM UNTIL THREE, LEAVING, THEN GOING BACK IN! That'll show the guys that they can't keep me out for long.

Day Catorse[That's probably spelled wrong, Dougie TRIPLE X sucks at Spanish above the number 13

So my plan to stay in my room and live in it forever failed when at like two this morning Harry burst through the door screaming something about Tom being pregnant. I freaked out until I figured out he was joking and then decided to attack him with my pillow which resulted in us rolling around on the floor.

"Oh good Harry, you finally told him then?" Tom said poking his head in and holding a loaf of bread and some eggs.

"What?" I asked confused as Harry hurried to the door and pushed the brunette boy out in a panic.

"Did Tom just have bread and eggs at 2 in the morning?" Harry said with that nervous giggle he gets, "That nutter!"

"Well sometimes Danny gets the craving for French toast a la Tom Fletcher really early in the morning and Tom knows that if he complies with Danny's demands he will get some boom boom in return." I stated simply and laid back on my bed, "What didn't you tell me?"

"ThatI'mtheteenieyou'vebeentalkingtoonline." Harry said in one breath and really fast.

"You're the what?" I asked confused, "Say it slower."

"I'm the teenie you've been talking to online." Harry said again and turned bright red, "Now excuse me while I go jump off the roof." He headed towards the door and I shot up and grabbed his arm making him look down.

"Don't go."

"What? Why not?" Harry said, still bring red and only in his boxers.

"Because, I don't care that you posed as a teenie…which why did you anyway?"

"I wanted to know what was going on inside your head Doug, and I knew you posed as a guy named Pete online so I went through with the plan and well uh," Harry said with a bit of a cough at the end.

"Then you know my secret."

"Well I already knew because you told all of the viewers of that show we were on yesterday!"

"Sorry bout that, I just…Harry Judd, you make me go insane."

"Crazy like the song by Britney Spears?" Harry said smirking.

"THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BRING HER UP!" I replied with a glare, "You know how objective I am to her methods!"

"So dancing around like a slut is a method now is it?" Harry asked with a glint to his eye.

"Only when she does it, anyway that's why I locked myself in my room obviously." I said going back to the original conversation, "Because I was afraid of what you would do."

"Oh Doug," Harry said shaking his head and sitting down on the floor against the door frame. I sat down next to him and brought my knees to my chest and gave a big sigh as I waited for it. "You are sucha dumbass."

"WHAT?" I said in shock, thinking he would say he hated me or that he thought I was disgusting. My eyes must have been the size of a Frisbee.

"This whole emo thing, which you can't do because emos don't smile, and the locking up in the room is because you're in love with me?" Harry asked looking at me and running a hand through his hair, "And the jumping off the roof?"

"Yep," I replied with a nod and then placed my chin on my knees.

"Dumbass," Harry said laughing and shaking his head, "You already had my attention."

"What?"

"Dougie, don't you get it or are you as thick as Danny?"

"What do you mean?" I demanded to know because currently I was in a confused state.

"I'm in love with you." Harry replied smiling, "I tried to say that before James came at us with an ax…that nutter…" And that was when my whole world seemed to click and the halleluia chorus started in my head. Great, now I have music in my head too! One day I'll end up like James, burnt from a toaster and unconscious from a wall.

Day Quince

Harry Mark Christopher Judd is now my boyfriend. BOYFRIEND! I just keep saying it over and over in my head again and again. Harryyy Juddd iss my boyffrienndd and notttt youuuuurss! Dougie Lee Judd, has a ring to it doesn't it? Or maybe it would be Harry Mark Christopher Poynter! Either way it sounds like it fits, like it should be. After Harry said he loved me I managed to push him against the wall and have my wicked way with him until Danny came in and started beating us both with Harry's cricket bat so he could get some sleep after eating his toast. Needless to say Harry took the bat and climbed into my bed next to me. Do you know how great it is to wake up and find a gorgeous boy next to you? IT IS BLOODY AMAZING LIKE HAVING THE PERFECT ICE CREAM FLAVOR OR RIDING A GIRAFFE AT THE ZOO…which of I've done neither but still. This morning after I got out of bed I skipped downstairs to find Tom and Danny holding hands and eating.

"You guys can't be apart for one second can you!" I said all bubbly, "IT'S SO CUTE!"

"Tom did you give Dougie the happy medicine again?"

"No…did you?"

"He's acting strange, like un-normally happy." Danny said eyeing me from his position at the table.

"I've just realized what I was missing!"

"Oh him and Harry finally told each other which is good because the sexual tension between you two was like overwhelming." Tom said with a nod and then smiled.

"Right, sexual tension…" I replied as I grabbed a banana and started eating it.

"God that's hot." A voice said as a pair of arms slipped around my waist.

"Hi there Harry!"

"Did you guys give Dougie happy pills again?"

"THAT WAS ONE TIME AND NO ONE CAN SEEM TO LET IT GO!" Tom said throwing his arms in the air as he let go of Danny's hand and then proceeded to turn on the television, "LOOK! IT'S MINISTRY OF MAYHEM!" Soon they had Name that Tone which resulted in Tom and I breaking into a rendition of Mr. Lee with some snazzy dance moves like the lawnmower or sprinkler.

"That Mr. Lee, he's sucha nice person!" I said smiling as Harry cuddled against my side. It felt good being like this, just me and him. It's like nothing could ruin this moment, nothing at all.

"Oh, phones ringin!" Danny called as he finished up his cereal. Tom rushed over and picked up the phone and made short answers until he hung it up.

"Apparently James broke out again and has found Matt along the way…" Tom said looking at us, "This might not be good."

"Wait as in Matt who went off and got drunk because of the break up Matt?" Harry asked as he looked over in confusion.

"CRAP STICKS! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEE! I JUST GOT MY LOVE AND NOW JAMES IS GOING TO MOLEST ME AND I'LL NEVER HAVE CHILDREN!"

"Doug, you're gay and there's always adoption." Tom pointed out.

"Oh right, well you never know." I said cooling down, "Read this brilliant story the other day online where you and I had a baby that was actually Harry's!"

"Wait, you and I had a baby…but it was actually Harry's?"

"Yes, because of this night in Mexico! It was one of the funniest stories ever!"

"I was pregnant?!" Tom said, not really comprehending this all, "How come I wasn't with Dan?"

"I don't know, Danny was with Harry." I explained and rolled my eyes, "Duh." Then Danny and Harry looked at each other and started screaming. "Did I say something wrong?"

"Dougie, I think we should let this one go now alright?" Tom said with an uneasy look, "I just hope to god I never get pregnant!"

Watch God will smite him and he will become the first man ever to have a baby! How will the baby even get out even…wow okay not even going to think about that. I'm just going to think about Harry Judd and his perfect eyes, perfect hair, perfect smile…perfect everything. If I hadn't already given up my virginity to that girl and all that I would of given it to him any day, it's his charm I think. See you tomorrow journal, don't miss me too much! I'm off for a day of Juddtastic pleasure! Ha I just giggled at myself, how odd.

**P.S. The story mentioned is This is why you NEVER let a fic write itself on McFly Slash by laderinmytights which is amazing really, never forget that night in Mexico**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dougie Poynter or James Bourne or any of McFly's sexualities**

**A/N: **Thank you to all the people that have read this story! The next one will be Harry Judd's Uber Sexy Notebook I think followed by Tom's Princess Diary and Danny Jones's I-Am-Great Booklet. Thanks for reviewing guys :D

Day Dieciseis

Spent a day and a wonderful night with Mr. Harry Judd and I'm now sitting on cloud nine. Woke up this morning next to him and felt like I had just died and gone to heaven really! I wandered past Tom and his guitar doing something, not going to ask what, and found my way downstairs to the kitchen seeing as it was basically time for Dougie to feed his little tummy. I was digging through our supplies and chucked a couple things of Marmite out, what the heck they were doing in there I don't know, and found this odd remote like thing.

"Hey Tom, this yours?" I called looking out in the living room and wandering over with the remote.

"Doesn't look like mine…" Tom said taking the small black remote and eyeing it, "Wonder if it's Danny's."

"Wonder if what is mine?" Danny added as he wandered in and ran a hand through his hair in mid yawn.

"Nice boxers."  
"WHAT? I think they look bloody good on me!" Danny protested as he looked down at his Teletubbies boxers.

"It's the Teletubbies Dan, do you have no brain?" I asked rolling my eyes as Tom continued to inspect the remote.

"I HAVE PLENTY OF BRAIN THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"

"More like close to none…"

"MORE LIKE CLOSE TO TONS OF BRAINS!"

"You can only have one brain in your head Danny!"

"SO? MAYBE I HAVE THREE!" Danny replied with a pout.

"Will you two stop with the freaking shouting?" Harry asked walking in and twisting his finger in his right ear, "Some people are trying to get a little sleep!"

"Harry!" I shouted and bounded over so I could attach to him.

"Morning babe, but really the shouting?" Harry said yawning, "I know it's almost noon and everything and that you like to have sugar…"  
"Sorry, we were really looking at this remote I found behind the marmite! Tom's got it."  
"We have marmite!?" Harry said pulling away from me and wandering into the kitchen.

"Well it's not mine!" Danny finally said with a nod, "Never seen it before in my life."  
"Must be Haz's then eh?" Tom said smiling and going back to his guitar and this pink diary that I had just noticed, it must be his thing to keep stuff in.

"Is that pink?" Harry asked wandering back with a mouth full of something and what I assumed to be marmite.

"It's my diary! You three have yours and this one is mine!"

"At least mine is manly…" I pointed out and held this journal up at him. Harry looked down at the small remote Tom had put on the table in front of us.

"Not mine either."  
"What?!" Tom said confused, "Then how did it get in our house?" And that's when the remote started beeping.

"Is it beeping?!" I screamed and held onto Harry tightly in shock.

"Wait a second is that James outside the window?" Danny said walking over confused as a sudden noise went off and everything went insane. Excuse me journal I have to go save Danny whose hair is apparently on fire.

Day Diecisiete

So yesterday James Bourne decided with the help of Matt Willis to plant a mini bomb in our house that looked like a remote with the marmite so Harry would go BOOOOOOM. It didn't work seeing as I found it first and we were all standing around it when it went off and did some damage to our living room. Tom's eyebrows got little singed and Danny's hair lit on fire a bit…Luckily I got a glass of water and poured it over Danny so he would stop screaming. Harry headed over to the window and opened it and James ran before we could do anything…little bugger…. We went to some Red Nose Week after thing for the rest of the day and got a late dinner at McDonalds before coming home. I woke up early and decided to write in you journal because you know everything there is to know about me, well most of it anyway. I guess I could always tell you things no one else knows about me right? Well let's see… Secretly I think marshmellow fluff is God's invention to the world and that sometimes I wish I had Charlie's eyebrows. Sometimes I wish I could be a lion tamer in the Circus or run around naked all day in a nudist colony. But the one thing no one knew about me until recently was that I was completely and utterly turned gay because of Harry Mark Christopher Judd. When I met him at that first audition my mind completely changed about woman and changed to Harry's perfect body. Oh hold on I need to go brush my teeth, got something stuck in one of them.

_Hi there Dougie's MAN Journal, ha that makes me laugh, I've decided to take over while Little Doug is in the bathroom grooming or something. I find it funny that he wanted Charlie's eyebrows; anyway the thing is Doug doesn't know that I became bisexual because of him. Yes, Harry Judd is not gay, but in fact bisexual….what can I say, I've had too many good lays with women! But there's something different about Dougie isn't there? I've fallen for it and I've fallen for it hard. Oh ho ho Dougie has just fallen over into the bathtub and now is screaming my name, later. – Harry_

Ha, I bet Judd will one day declare himself GAY, G-A-Y, GAY because of some mind blowing thing I will do to him! It is now my goal…and I DIDN'T FALL OVER AND FALL INTO THE BATHTUB! I was dancing and happened to slip on a wet spot and lose my balance.

_You tripped…-Harry _

LIES, LIES, LIES! Don't listen to the fit boy with the blue eyes and side burns! STAY AWAYYYY! Oh so I dyed my hair again, isn't that great? It's still dark brown and everything but now I've added more blonde to parts of the bangs even though I miss my purple mess and lip ring…stupid thing got infected…Harry says it looks DRAMATIC and SEXY. I'll go with whatever Mr. Sexy says and be his slavveeee. Forever and ever you'll be in my heart and I will love you forever and ever…SORRY! SORRY! Tom was watching that movie (My Best Friend's Wedding or something?) a little while ago and it just got stuck in my head really, not kidding. Harry's now tugging on my arm and telling me he needs help with something so I'm going to assume journal that you know what that means and let him drag me off into the night. Oh I should so start working on a song involving two lovers who couldn't be together but finally are! AND I'LL CALL IT PENNSYLVANIA!

Day Dieciocho

Harry says I shouldn't call it Pennsylvania because that's a stupid name so I suggested Transylvania and Tom, who was eavesdropping this morning, told me if I write it then it can go on the CD! Just my luck! Which reminds me we got these scripts for this movie Just My Luck today, which is going to be filmed in America with that girl Lindsay Lohan. I think Harry used to fancy her, but we all know that I have changed his mind from that direction at the moment. See like a month ago we met with this American director who decided he wanted us to play the main British band in the movie that gets a jump start in America from the two main characters switching their luck and finally we've gotten the scripts! I don't get many lines though because Tom told them I was camera shy…which I'm SO not anymore…that was just back when I was young and innocent! But whatever, I've gotten over it because I'd probably mess up all my lines anyway. Tom has like all the lines, so does Danny, and Harry has a bit…I just get to make throw up noises….BLAARRAAAGGAHHHHH! The cops called today and said our neighbors reported suspicious activity happening in our front yard. Danny and Tom went out to investigate, stopping to make out along the way of course, and found James in a tree costume standing in our yard. Harry and I ran out after putting some clothes on and stood next to our other two friends in confusion.

"James, you're standing in our yard…in a tree costume…" I stated and gave him a weird look.

"What?" James said looking around, "No I'm not."  
"Yes."  
"No."

"YES!"  
"NO!"  
"YES BLOODY FRUITCAKE YES!"

"NO FREAKING PINEAPPLE NO!"

"DON'T MOCK MY LINGO!"  
"I CAN MOCK YOUR LINGO WHENEVER I WANT TOO!"

"James, seriously, stop prevoking Dougie…you know he doesn't like it when someone insults his individuality." Harry said slipping an arm around Dougie's neck and pulling the boy close, "Now please get out of our yard before we call the cops again.

"The cops?!" James said with wide eyes, "They know I've escaped?"  
"Yes, and apparently you picked up Matt on the way here?" Danny replied, "Saw you two lookin in the window when you set me hair on fire!"

"Sorry bout that.." James mumbled before starting into a fast waddle, "YOU'LL NEVER GET ME COPPERS!"

"Did he just dive into a bush?"  
"I think so…" Harry said looking around. We had to work most of the day after that since Fletch pulled up and asked what we were all doing in the driveway staring at a man in a tree costume in a bush. Tom told him we'd explain it to him when he was older. Oh seeing James reminds me, we have to buy a new toaster!

Day Diecinueve

I can't believe the nerve Danny had. He took my favorite stuffed animal like EVER and threw him out the window!!! Well I guess he had reason too but it all started like this…

"Danny, why do you lose brain cells so much?" I asked him as we worked on a song and talked about the upcoming tour.

"I don't know Dougie, I don't?" Danny replied confused.

"No you do, from Tom banging you so much! I knew you were the submissive one!"

"COME HERE YOU RUNT!" Danny screamed and hopped over the couch which made it into a pursuit around the house.

"HARRY SAVE ME!" I squeaked running past my boyfriend who just stood there in a towel in confusion after getting out of the shower.

"THAT WASN'T FUNNY!" Danny screamed as we ran into my room and I dived into the closet. "DOUGIE!"  
"Going to Narnia, be right back!" I squeaked out as I hid in the closet.

"Mr. Snuggles is going out the window." I heard Danny's voice call and I opened the closet doors slightly.

"YOU WOULDN'T!"

"I so would." Danny said smirking as he threw the bear.

"MR. SNUGGLES!!!!" Danny then proceeded to walk out of the room with a smug grin on his face. Wait till I tell Tom, he will so get it. So now I'm sitting here on the floor of my closet crying because Mr. Snuggles has just taken a death march out the window.

"Doug?" a voice called looking around, "Doug, what are you doing down there?" I looked up to see Harry, now fully clothed, looking down at me in confusion.

"Crying."  
"Why's that?" Harry said and sat down in front of me in the closet and giggled as clothing ruffled his hair.

"Danny threw Mr. Snuggles out the window…"

"Oh Dougie..." Harry said and then proceeded to hold me close to him. That had to be one of the best moments in my life. We just sat there like that for what seemed like ages until Tom came marching in.

"YOU TWO IN THE CLOSET!"

"What?" Harry said looking up, "Can't you see were having some US time?"

"WHAT IS THIS?" Tom said holding out Mr. Snuggles. I noticed he was in a big sun hat and had on pink gloves.

"Were you…gardening?"  
"Geeze Tom, way to gay it up."

"STOP IT! THIS…THING…LANDED IN MY GARDINIAS!"

"He's a bear, not a thing. Bear's have feelings too you know!"

"So?"  
"Danny threw it in all honesty." Harry cut in and Tom marched out and something happened that we shouldn't really get into…there were a lot of noises after a little bit of yelling. Lots of noises.

Day Veinte

Well journal it's the last day me and the guys have decided to keep these. We're going to put them all in a box and bury them in the backyard so one day maybe someone will find them when were dead (and still famous) and sell them on super ebay or something. Good plan right? I'm going to be sad to see you go since you got me through my times of manliness and love with Harry…maybe I should start an online one of you? But not call it DOUGIE'S BLOG or people might get ideas about McFly. Let's tell one last story before I throw you into the box. So to the people who will one day find this and read all this, if James has killed me please send him a box that will explode when he opens it. JUST JOKING! Seriously, I'm not like a pyro maniac or something. So James was finally caught again outside a store licking the windows, not gonna have to worry about him for a long time. Harry told me something today that made me very happy; here let me tell you about it for old time's sake. ..

"Hey Dougie?" Harry said poking his head into my room.

"Yes my love?" I said laughing as he sat down beside me and fingered his own journal. He started laughing and smiling and I got on top of him and looked down at him. "What do you find about me funny?!"

"Nothing, I just love to see you smile."  
"Is that so?"  
"Yes Dougie Poynter, your smile lights up my life to be honest."

"Good cause yours lights up mine too, and your laugh, and your hair…"  
"Dougie…"  
"And your eyes, your stubble, your laugh…"  
"Dougie!"

"Your crazy sense of humor, your voice when you actually sing…"  
"Dougie, I love you."

"Your kisses-WHAT?"

"I love you, I always have."  
"Oh gods Harry," I said looking at him with a bit of a teary eyed look, "You don't know how much that means."  
"What saying I love you? Cause it's true." Harry said smirking.

"I love you too."

AND THAT'S WHEN WE GOT INTO A BIG PUMPKIN CARRIAGE AND LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER IN A BIG GLASS CASTLE. No, really, we didn't but it would be cool if we did, I'd probably be the princess. Princess Dougie Judd and Prince Harry Judd. Tom and Danny would be our best friends from the neighboring kingdom where Tom would be Queen and Danny would be King…ah so much for dreams. Now even though I'm gay and I'm completely and utterly in love with a boy named Harry Judd I am still a manly man with a manly journal. You and I will always know that you and I are manly journal, we always will. So right now I'm outside watching the boys place their books in, each one a different color and full of memories and I look down at you while I write. It was nice writing in you journal, don't go changing alright? Love always Dougie Lee Poytner and his life.


End file.
